- Pujya K.C. Narayana

One of the problems with some persons who practice PAM is that they are already accustomed to think in terms of the Divinity or Spirituality in a particular way. If we have to call that accustomed manner of conceiving about the nature of reality and the means to achieve the same as addiction also, it may not be far from truth. It may be surprising that we are using the word ‘addiction’ in this context as though it is similar to the addiction to alcohol or some drugs which work on the brain and put persons in altered state of consciousness. The reality however is that we do alter our moods with our beliefs.

This is very simple to understand if we observe the persons who are disillusioned with their beliefs. Their dazed condition is something that wells up within us a positive concern to improve their lot. The pain their body and mind goes through in the disillusionment of their beliefs and trusts is not unlike the psychological pain a drug addict feels when he/she runs out of dope.

Disillusionment is however not rare, this happens when we have trusted a friend with our saved money for investment, or with our dependants for their welfare in upbringing etc., and that friend finally thinks it better for him not to retain the trust reposed on him. This may however finally prove to be due to our ‘ignorance’ of the real nature of the person trusted, but that does not change the nature of our disillusionment. When the truth is revealed, then there is total shattering of the belief and disillusionment in him. Not only that the shattering is such that our belief in our own worth or capacity is totally lost many a time. The illusion or belief of having a friend is shattered. We leave the fictitious world of what we thought was the truth and enter the quite opposite reality of having no friend. This is actually a crisis of identity. When a belief in identity is shattered, then there is the feeling that life is over because we are not who we thought (intelligent?) we were.

If such a shattering were to happen in the spiritual realm with reference to a guru or guide or god or goddess in whom we have reposed our faith the consequences are disastrous. But reality does not sink that easily and we tend to delude ourselves in the company of similar such disillusioned persons even as addicts join together in the clubs. This behavior is essentially to avoid the discomfort of disillusionment and thus we surround ourselves with like-minded people and feed our addiction to beliefs. Surely no one would die normally of belief withdrawals, like an alcoholic might, whose body has become so much accustomed to alcohol that when it is withdrawn his body revolts. In case of belief disillusionment we may observe nervous breakdown and in some cases note suicidal tendencies. Sometimes people are so quick to pick up a new belief that they hardly have a chance to live even a few moments without the burden of beliefs and believe they are the ones who want freedom or moksha.

The reason why some other persons seek to try out PAM is perhaps due to their feeling that they are not getting the expected result in the path (as compared to the belief in a person ) they followed so far amounting to almost disbelieve that system of practice. And in some cases since the disillusionment is not total they would like to ride two horses and end up in the middle. Another reason is, their ‘ego’ does not permit to accept a posture of one having been led to disillusionment and face reality. The preconceived notions of the real nature of Reality in which they believed though were proved wrong and they are in a way convinced has not led them anywhere in the path of spirituality and they tend to accept at least tentatively the profound concepts of PAM, the ‘ego’ and ‘its knowledge so assiduously acquired through earlier methods of practice’ does not yield to its shrinkage.

Thus the war of thoughts therefore continues most of the time in their mind during sadhana even when what they think they are trying the system. The effect of Pranahuti many times leaves them in a dazed condition, though such a condition is due to the so far unaccustomed ‘silence in silence’. These are the cases where the practitioner says though there is this state of consciousness; he has not gained any knowledge from that experience.
It is necessary that the practioners in this system should be prepared to renounce their pet notions of the nature of mind, ahankar and manas and accept the much clarified concepts given by the great Master. It is not a question of whether the ancients were right or wrong. This is a new darshana and should be followed as the darshana demands. In this context I remember an interesting story to make my point clear here. “ A goat, a cow, and a horse were walking along discussing spiritual things when they all spotted a tuft of green grass. The goat said, "I am the oldest and the wisest so I should be the one to eat the grass." The cow said "I can give milk to feed many and this altruism should be rewarded, so I should eat the grass." The horse leaned over, ripped the grass out of the ground, and held it over the heads of the others and ate. The horse then pronounced, "You two are very holy indeed but I have a longer neck which obviously has far greater spiritual significance.” This new system is like the horse which can and does liberate sincere seekers from the bondages of their unfounded beliefs and attachments to odd notions of the nature of reality.